To begin on a serious note, I would like to clarify that I respect women a lot and hold them in high esteems. Without women life on earth was not possible, may be now, Science, a huge douche bag is trying to steal that reputation from women by cloning, test tube baby, making female robots as partners and other medical shit but that’s a long way down the road and till then no one on earth can replace a woman. I respect and love my Ma, my sister, my sister’s daughter, my ex-gfs (well not all to be honest), elderly ladies annoying you with talks about your marriage, Middle age aunties with tons of make up on their face, random girl walking on road if she is cute, ok even if she is not cute, I mean you got the drift that I respect them all. Their importance and role in shaping our life is beyond our small brain’s thinking capacity. They are next to God and for the love of that God and I will repeat this one more time, for the sake of survival of Human race, please STOP DRIVING.
“I take my words back on that next to god thing”
I am not a misogynist or a backward illiterate which most of the girls in my FB friend list or my female readers on Word press or indiblogger will call me after reading this but if you are a girl and you are still reading this and haven’t closed the window due to sheer anger at me than please read the two stories I am about to narrate. I wasn’t directly affected in both these stories but I was somehow lucky that I wasn’t directly linked as both these stories had the potential to put me on hospital bed for a long period of time.
Few days back I posted a status on facebook narrating how my bike got hit by a girl driving a car while I was just waiting at the signal for the red light to turn green and there was no need for that girl to drive so fast when there was a huge traffic on road. But maybe I was wrong, may be that girl was upset because of a fight at home, husband not paying attention to her, her kids getting only 96% while her best friend’s kid got 98%, Saas- bahu had a huge fight on her favorite TV show because Bahu was wearing green bindi with red saree, Mihir Virani died Again, I mean I don’t know why she was upset but that was not the right place or way to show wrath on innocent bystanders, pedestrians and bike riders. My sympathy goes for that woman, I feel sorry for her and I forgive her for hitting me. But the stories I am going to narrate, well these women can’t be forgiven, their sins are much greater, they not only jeopardize their life but the life of others and in one story there is a kid involved.
“Study properly or I will get us both killed”
This is a story of a kid and her over caring, over protective and over the top stupid and reckless driver mother whose main aim is life to get her kid into IIT at any cost even if it cost her kid’s life.
“Don’t make me drive you to school”
It was a bright sunny weekday morning, people were going to their respective workplaces, parents dropping their kids to school, all going smoothly. I was also following my similar routine. On my way to my dreadful office, I have to pass through a narrow passage of 1 kilometer where you can’t overtake any vehicle, so on this particular day I was following a santro car which was moving way too slow than usual speed, at first I didn’t pay any attention but the painfully slow speed of the car bothered me a little, I thought that it might be because of flat tyres or engine trouble but to my amusement I realized that the driver wasn’t paying full attention on road. Suddenly an auto zip past in front of that car at an intersection and driver of santro who wasn’t paying much attention on road earlier almost hit the rear of auto. The santro driver failed to notice the red light at the intersection. I wanted to see the driver, not because I was curious but I just wanted to shout at him at the top of my voice and this is when I for the first time saw the most stupid car driver I have ever seen in my whole life, A woman of around 30-35 with a kid of around 8-9 sitting on the next seat WITH NO SEAT BELT and there was a book on the steering, yes you heard me, A Frickin’ book, she was taking an oral test of her kid while driving at the same time. It is hard to even imagine that this could have ended into a brutal and horrifying accident just because of recklessness of the mother.
“Stupid road is so Boring, I am going to do some girl gossip”
Sure, roads are boring if you follow the same route every day for years, all the bill boards are same, all the shops are same, hell even you meet same strangers almost every day at intersections, for example I frequently see this Indo-Tibetan police force bus on my way to home so yeah, I give you that the roads are kinda boring. So what you do in that case, put on some music, day dreaming, talk to fellow companion, stuff like that but what you should not do is talk on phone and I am not being a sexist (I am not calling myself sexy, it means a person who discriminate on the basis of gender) here, so I accept that both male and female drivers talk on phone.
It was raining heavily that evening, roads were slippery as a snake in wet grass, I was driving at a precautionary speed following a car driven by, and you guessed it right, a girl (I don’t always follow girl’s car, it’s just a weird coincidence, please don’t think me as a girl’s car chasing dog). There wasn’t much traffic ahead of her so she was enjoying her speed of 60-70 kmph; a truck overtook her car at a mild speed, I don’t know what freaked her out but suddenly she applied brakes and in situation like these this sudden application of brake leads to chain reaction of one following the other, she applied, I somehow managed to apply and prevent my bike from skidding, but the guy following me wasn’t that much lucky, his bike skid and he fell but because of the gap between that guy and the next vehicle which was a big ass Mahindra Bolero he survived somehow, so after all he wasn’t that much unlucky.
“Nothing much Sweetie, Killing some stupid pedestrians”
Since I am a curious case of Prakhar Gupta so I really need to know what freaked her out or why she lost her balance, and I saw what I expected, she was talking on her phone and looking by her expressions, she wasn’t giving counseling or business talks to anyone, she was doing what every girl’s favorite activity is and you don’t have to be a NASA scientist to guess that one, it’s right there in the title.
Time for punch line (happened two days back)
I was driving my friend Gaurav to his home after office and wasn’t paying much attention on road since there wasn’t much traffic, I was following a car (ok SERIOUSLY, I really don’t follow girl’s car, just a weird coincidence) and this is when Gaurav said “Dhyan se bike chala, aage ladki car chal rhi hai”. Hence proving that I am not the only one petrified of their driving skill.
This is Prakhar gupta, Have a nice, No, have safe day and if you see a girl driving a car, maintain distance, she has the potential to kill you.